How childhood memories affecting relationships? What is ACE? If you want to resolve your childhood trauma, you first need to understand it. Trauma can generate some momentous emotions, and unless we learn how to process these emotions, we will continue to repeat the same damaging patters that keep us stuck and hurting. Refusing to face the traumas of our past causes them to fester like a sore; staying in our bodies as unconscious energy that wrecks everything from our employment prospects to our romantic relationships. Childhood trauma is caused by any situation in which a child perceives that they are in an extremely frightening, dangerous or overwhelming position. This can occur either when they themselves feel threatened, or it can occur when they see someone they love struggling, harmed or otherwise belittled, abused or demeaned.
Ludus is a child-like and flirtatious love commonly found in the beginning stages of a relationship (a.k.a. the honeymoon stage). This type of love consists of teasing, playful motives and laughter between two people. Although common in young couples, older couples who strive for this love find a more rewarding relationship. Your emotions allow you to feel giddy, excited, interested and involved with another person. Mania is an obsessive love towards a partner. It leads to unwanted jealousy or possessiveness — known as codependency. Most cases of obsessive love are found in couples with an imbalance of love towards each other. An imbalance of Eros and Ludus is the main cause of Mania. With healthy levels of playful and romantic love, the harm of obsessive love can be avoided.
In preschool and kindergarten, your child is discovering new ways of acting and socializing, and the best way for you to support their social growth is to lead by example. Your child learns how to make friends, cooperate, and share with others by seeing your interactions. It is important to use your influence to help him or her become a socially aware individual capable of having lasting relationships. Take time to talk to your child about their feelings, beliefs, and concerns, and share your values. You can also give examples of how you approach the different social interactions in your life to help them better understand how to apply these concepts to their own lives and relationships.
Whether you want to believe it or not, your childhood has a big impact on the way you see the world. One influence that it has particularly is in regards to how you interact in your adult relationships. This video discusses specifically romantic relationships – which it refers to as love styles. Love styles are defined here as our tendencies and inclinations of how we respond to our romantic partners. Do any of these childhoods trigger something in you? Watch the video to learn about how each of these types of childhoods can affect your adult romantic relationships. Find additional details at click here for childhood memories affecting relationship.
Children who experience traumatic incidents may develop dysfunctional attachment styles. Developing healthy attachments requires feelings of security and safety. Avoidant attachment occurs when a child does not receive the benefit of a secure attachment, and become self- sufficient, and independent. Once they have reached adulthood, they continue to self-rely and do not attach themselves to others easily. Ambivalent attachment occurs when you experience a mix of neglect and attention. This can be confusing to a child’s development. Once they reach adulthood they tend to experience anxiety in relationships and require a lot of soothing and attention. These are just two of multiple dysfunctional attachment styles that may arise from childhood trauma. So how do we cope with trauma so we may learn from our past experiences?
